PUNCH

WARNING: Do NOT drink the fruit punch at a Czech party...even if the party is for a 1year birthday celebration of a little girl and the punch is within reach of small fingers. Contents will make you feel fruitier than it looks. Enough said.

FATTY

The one thing I keep hearing as my Czech loved ones see me is, "You look thin. Have you lost the weight? It's good!" In fact, I am pretty sure EVERYONE has said that.
So apparently I left to America as a fatty. Six months of dumplings and eating 8 times a day will do that to you, I suppose.
Next, I try to explain that I didn't necessarily lose weight in America...but I GAINED weight in Czech and THIS is what I normally look like.
And then I reassure them I won't leave a fatty this time and I get reminded of my promise every time I pass the sausages at a BBQ.
Thank you, Czech Republic.

3 THINGS

3 things in life I wish could always be free no matter where you are in the world:

*clean water
*parking
*use of toilets

FAKT JO

Maybe I act like I am 12 years old sometimes, but hearing this phrase makes me giggle a bit. Go ahead and say it out loud to yourself (fahkt yo). The first time I heard it said I was a little taken back. I started to hear it a lot and thought these Czechs are little cussers. Then I learned it's a phrase equivalent to "Is that a fact?!" in English. Say it again fakt jo, fakt jo, fakt jo. Tee hee.

NO RETURN POLICY

The local T-mobile salesgirl was about to feel the wrath of deanna when she told me misleading information to make a sale then revealed the truth after selling the item and telling me there is a no return policy. I am NOT a stupid American who will just take the unfair deal and I stayed until I got my Kc's back. She probably has a bad impression of American consumers now but my Czech salesclerk AND T-mobile customer service opinion was lowered a notch or two. (I wasn't mean...I was just persistent.)I DO NOT LIKE STORE POLICIES OF NO RETURNS, deanna I am.

SMURFS

How long has it been since you watched an episode of the Smurfs? Too long for me obviously because I am loving the season 1 DVD with all the ridiculous lingo. Listen to these sentences I heard:
*Ah, Smurfette, I'm gonna smurf you the smurfiest present ever.
*Absmurflutely!
*Go on...smurf me a good one!
What exactly is a smurf?! A noun, verb, adjective...what??

AHOJ

The all-too-familiar words and sights of the Czech Republic are sinking in my heart and head right now. That's right, I'm back in Plzen and all Chizzeched in as of 10am this morning for another 3 months. Keep in touch through facebook, this here blog, email, text messages (but don't always expect a response because it's free for me to receive but costs a pretty penny...or 40...for me to send em), or try tying a note around the neck of a magical unicorn and see if that reaches me. OR maybe, just maybe, you can come to Prague and we can hang out on Charles Bridge dodging spiders and eating rohliks till our hearts content...just a suggestion. Ahoj.

FAREWELL PROJECT 626

When I left to Oklahoma, I left my car with the parental unit and told them to try to sell it if they knew of a buyer since I was considering purchasing a new one. Well, my mother phoned me one day while I was there to inform me that she didn't sell it, but had decided to trade it in so SHE could get a new car. Uh what?! I laughed and didn't know if she was serious. To my surprise, upon returning home Friday night (for three days to get ready to leave Tuesday morning for Czech), I noticed there was no more Mazda and there was indeed a new car parked in the driveway.
So I bid farewell to Project 626. Much fun was had in all the seats of that car by many. My your new owner be able to handle your sweet curves and dodgy back seat passenger door lock.

THANK YOU LEANN WOMACK...

Living might mean taking chances
But they're worth taking.
Lovin' might be a mistake
But it's worth making.

I AM ACTUALLY ADMITTING THIS...

I am actually admitting this...and I know it is kinda nerdy, but I love squished pennies. They are my favorite souvenir of all time. I don't need expensive t-shirts, key chains, or stuffed animals to take home from a vacation; I just need 51 cents and I am in heaven.

So if you want me to fall in love with you or to be my best friend...and yes, I am admitting money WILL buy my love (at least in the form of a penny) you can go to this site CLICK CLICK and check for machines on your route and maybe we can work out a trade. They just make me smile.

*DISCLAIMER: Purchasing a squished penny for me might not actually make me fall in "love" with you (especially if you are a member of the same sex)...and I don't even think the god of love himself knows what will do that, but you are 100% money-back guaranteed that it will cause me to really really really like you.

LEFTOVERS

I am a total leftover fan. If I don't finish my food at a restaurant, I love To Go boxes (in fact I usually eat the food on the car ride home). But I have found one food that doesn't taste so good the next day: Macaroni and Cheese.

FLUSHED

Last Saturday, I learned cell phones CAN and WILL flush down the toilet. Enough said. So if you have my digits and want me to have yours, go ahead and text my celltron with your name and I'll save it. If you don't want me to have your number any more and didn't know how to tell me, then you're off the hook...your worries are now flushed and swimming with the fishies.

PS This blast from the past song came to my mind immediately following the event.

DEAR CAP'N

Dear Cap'n (of the crunch variety),
As with most boys, it seems I have developed a love/hate relationship with you. I love to eat your cereal in the morning, but hate how it scratches the roof of my mouth. Will we stand the test of time and remain together til empty bag do us part or will I need to move on down the aisle to another, more gentler variety?
xoxoxo

OKC

On Monday, my new Jersey welder friend Matt and I went to Oklahoma City to see some new sights. After passing many tolls, plenty of Cowboy museums, and fighting the wind yet once again we made it to OKC.

1st stop: the OKC bombing memorial. Mental note to self-if you try to take a photo on self timer and the day is super windy, the camera may have a sticker that says it's shock proof up to 4ft but the marble on the ground WILL crack it and Olympus will NOT fix it after it's blown off the hand rail.

2nd stop: Pops. It's essentially a gas station with 259 varieties of soda pop in a bottle, a small diner where they put egg on a BLT and fizz up your cup with Round Barn Root Beer only available there in Arcadia, a ginormous soda bottle outside that lights up and changes color at night, and an amazing million dollar awning. Oh and they had cool handles on the sink and toilet in the bathroom.

3rd stop:Pole Position Raceway (or P2R for us VIP members). After I realized we weren't playing bumper cars, I'm pleased to say we made top 12 fastest times for the week.

4th stop:The Haunted House Restaurant. I didn't see any ghosts but the cold temp, 192 year old hostess, creaking doors, spooky music from the iPhone, and hauntingly delicious food made for a frightfully good time.

I KNOW FOR A FACT YOU DON'T PARTY

I totally took a photo with Hot Rod and the Easter Bunny. My name is deanna and...I like to party!

PS If you haven't seen the movie Hot Rod, well I'd have to say you used to be legit. You were too legit. You were too legit to quit. but now you're not legit. you're unlegit. And for that reason, you must quit.

EASTER IN THE BIBLE BELT

We piled into the suburban to go to what we thought was just your average Easter egg hunt at the local Methodist Church. But, alas, we were fooled into a 2 hour eggstravaganza where I left with scriptures on silver coins and these jumping Jesus, Mary, and dove toys (THE best prizes from the egg hunt in my opinion). Gotta love Easter in the Bible Belt!

THE CURIOUS CASE OF THE TACKY BUTTON

Last month, I mailed a greeting card with a gift card inside home to my dad. As I stepped up to the counter at the post office/bank/dry cleaner (all in one location...don't ask), I inquired about the helpful clerk's button she was wearing on her shirt. She giggled in excitement that I noticed and told me the meaning of it. Great. Then she gladly set my envelope aside to hand stamp it and charged me $0.42 for the stamp along with the price of some post card stamps I also needed to purchase.

Today, after having a great morning of finding a gem of a book at the local used book store (it's called The Dot and the Line: a Romance in Lower Mathematics by Norton Juster) for only 25 cents, eating a salad with some super yummy poppy seed dressing, and being oh-so-happy about the lack of wind this afternoon, I started to get annoyed by the construction traffic and horrible drivers in Tulsa. My bad. But the last stop on my errand list was the post office and then I was off the road.



Keep in mind, I was at the same post office, mailing the same contents (happy birthday Brother Darren this time), and in line with the same clerk at the counter. The only difference was I didn't ask about her just as equally tacky button on her shirt today and questioned her when she wanted to charge me $0.62 for a normal sized, first-class weight envelope because she couldn't run it through her machine...which meant she would hand stamp it (which wasn't a problem last time). What the heck?! Just goes to show both your attitude and the clerks at the counter can effect the whole transaction. Beast.

21st & RIVERSIDE

My new favorite place in Tulsa: 21st and Riverside. There is a park with ducks, playgrounds, and a machine that lets you borrow a bike (as long as you return it within 24 hours) for free to ride down the path along the river. I felt like I was in California only with less beach and more wind.

APRIL FOOLED

I desperately needed a hair cut this day so I turned down 81st and looked for my local hair salons. I went into one place that said they do family cuts for men, women and children starting at $10.95/ cut. When I walked in, the lady said it was $40.95 for women for a wash, cut, and style. However, they don't really have many women customers so they don't really style it (just a blow dry) because they don't have any brushes in the place. OK SO I thanked her for her time and walked out.

Next stop, a place that actually had salon in the name. They wanted to charge me $35 for just a cut. "Do you blow dry it or do I leave sopping wet?" was my question. $25 more for that and then extra for a style.

With a few other stops in between, I finally gave up and walked into the next salon I saw and let my sista stylist do her work. I instructed her not to cut it too much no matter what I told her (because I love to notice a difference when I get it cut but I'm trying to grow it out). When I left, my hair was slightly above my shoulders making it a little bit shorter than planned...I guess I was April fooled.

I HATE PSORIASIS...

...but I hate death even more. I just saw this commercial tonight and I can't believe anyone would even consider taking this medication after hearing the side effects. It's like when Fat Free Pringles containing olestra were introduced to the market and the can warned it may cause loose stool and abdominal cramping. Ok sign me up! Seriously people?!

SUNRISE, SUNSET

After a day of riding horses and enjoying the sweet Oklahoma country air, I was watching the sunset through the window and the question came up of whether I like to watch the sunrise or sunset. I thought that question was a no-brainer...sunset, of course, because I have to be up way too early to catch a sunrise.

But the very next morning, I was up before the sun and got the opportunity to fly in a little plane and watch the sunrise from the sky. I think that has become my new favorite sunrise memory. And yes, I got to steer the plane...all those years of playing Top Gun on the Nintendo with my brothers finally paid off!

YES, MA'AM

Last night, I went country dancing and I noticed at least two guys said "Yes, ma'am," to me when I asked them a question as we were scootin our boots on the dance floor. At first, I thought, 'Yes, ma'am...I'm not 50 years old.' Then I realized these are southern boys and they are proper respectful. So go ahead and show me that southern hospitality and charm me! Yes, Ma'am me all you want!

FAILURE?

Today I went into an office where the girls at the front desk were giggling and modeling their new purse (or purses for most because they said a girl can never have too many) and then it hit me....I might be a failure at being a girl. Here are my reasons why:
1. I don't carry a purse to match every outfit. In fact, I don't even like the word purse.
2. My favorite color is NOT pink.
3. I don't consider myself to be needy.
4. I kinda hate cats and when I see them I kinda want to kick them (but I never would).
5. I'm not that terrible of a driver.
6. I don't like to shop.
7. I don't have to leave something on my plate when I go out to eat to seem dainty.
8. I have an opinion. I won't push it on people, but I'll share it when needed.
9. I've never had my nails done.
10. I don't take crap from boys and
11. I'm not afraid to get dirty.
So there you have it...do I suck at being a girl?

OKLA HO-MAN

I've learned that if a boy here says, "New to the area? I'll be your friend and show you around Tulsa," what he really means is, "I want a tour of your pants." They never change...no matter where I am in the world.

ROCK, PAPER, SCISSORS

"Rock, paper, scissors...show me what you got," is a phrase I hear at least once a day. It seems after making a suggestion on how to solve a small arguement, I've created 4 little monsters who now use rock, paper, scissors to determine who gets to sit where in the car, goes first when playing a game, gets the last bite of a piece of dessert, or even whether they leave the night light on or off at bedtime.
"But, deanna, we rock, paper, scissored it...."

OKIE DOKIE

A few things I've encountered from week 1 in Oklahoma:
"Oklahoma, where the wind blows..." The song is true. As I went out for a morning run, I learned it blows and it blows COLD. Maybe this sign I saw as I was transferring airports should've been a clue.

Wal*mart is EVERYwhere and apparently, saves the best parking spots for flying birds carrying sacks of babies.

I drove by the Oral Roberts University and saw a giant pair of clapping hands. While I was there, I prayed for hair for DB, men for J, and less wind for me.

If the praying with the hands doesn't work, then maybe buying tacos from the taco mobile outside the church with the giant rotating faith sign will work. Gotta love the bible belt.

Deciding to get some kicks on Route 66, I ended up in the Art Deco part of Tulsa and fell in love with a Sunday stroll in perfect sunny weather and beautiful architecture.

SUPER SEXY PRICE

I don't really like shopping but I just couldn't take my eyes off these shoes. They hypnotized me so much that I couldn't decide between black or brown so I bought both. I know...I know. But, I got them for a super sexy price. Instead of paying the $130 suggested retail price, I got them on sale with a $5 off coupon per pair for a total of $15 for both (alright $15 something including the 8.517% OK sales tax)!

DOGGONE GOOD TIME

Yesterday, I rounded up the gang and the five of us went to the local Tulsa library to PAWS for READING (where kiddies get to read to registered therapy dogs and get to take a book home as a souvenir). We then stopped at PetSmart for adoption day and pet and played with some dogs. Finally, we went home and ate hot dogs for lunch. Does that last activity make me a bad person? All I know is we had a doggone good time.

TOM CRUISE, WHERE ARE YOU?!

Sometimes I sit and wonder 'Why am I not married to Tom Cruise?' I mean, I think I'd look good on the cover of People Magazine...with all that great makeup, trick lighting, and someone's photoshop skills.
Then I'd get cool things...like free clothes and shoes and maybe even have my own line of fashion socks or something. Just a thought. A girl can dream, right? Come on, Tom Cruise, where are you?!

AAHHH THE MOMS

It's birthday time for the moms. A BIG birthday this year! In fact, I think she's gettin close to the senior discount at the Sizzler. woot! woot!

Important things my mom has taught me:

Always wear clean underwear...because you never know when United Airlines will lose your luggage before a hot hot vacation to the Florida beaches and leave you in the jeans you left Utah wearing for 3 days.

Shake it...even when you have lovely 'grandma humps'

Don't be afraid to toot your own horn...or maybe antler...

There's nothin wrong with showin a little.... or wait is it searching for... some red footed boobies in Hawaii.

and No one can put the ass in embarrass like your family.

AAHHH the Moms, You've been there for me through the big and little (faces/clothes), the good and the bad (dates/jobs), smart and the stupid (decisions/roommates), and the broken and good (hearts/cell phones/cars). Can't thank you enough for everything you do and the person you are. You've got a heart so big. Love your face!

I AM IN LOVE

It's true. It's time to admit it. I am so happy, I want to shout it from the rooftop and let everyone know that I AM IN LOVE...
with online banking!
I can be anywhere in the country or world even and take care of my finances. No late fees, no automated phone calls, no wondering if the check made it to the mail in time, etc. Mr. online banking, you are a genius! I love you.

Oklahoma is OK

I left Utah to Oklahoma on Thursday for a bit to work. Surprise!...for some. I haven't seen much besides 3 of the 12 local Walmart stores, lots of dry grass, and my new 4 friends. PS I discovered the most wonderful thing at Wal*mart: I'm not sure if it's a permanent item or if it's just for Valentine's Day, but they have an aisle with international chocolate. That's right, I was worried I'd have to go back to Germany to find my favorite chocolate treats, but now it's just around the corner. (I'll probably find another excuse to travel back though.)


So all I have to say right now is Oklahoma is OK. Give me a little bit more time to explore the place.

Moving on, it's Valentine's Day and I wish I had a new slide show to post, but, alas, I don't have any of my photos with me, so here is last years again...

In honor of love, Valentine's Day, and all that shiz.
BOYS: Take notes from these dudes.
GIRLS: Find these guys and don't ever let them go.

NEW TECHNOLOGY

Happiest day of my life...
I inherited a cord thingy to plug the ipod into the car. New technology meet Mazda; Mazda new tech. So happy together!

I'M JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU

...but I might be if you bought me one of these:


I'm kinda really obsessed with this machine right now. I think it might be my next purchase. I dream about 2.3 million pixels of perfection, long lasting batteries, silky glass clickity click click surfaces, being instantly wireless, limitless ports, 2.8GHz and kicking into SuperDrive because sometimes I feel the need for speed.... Dear MacBook Pro, You are gorgeous. I haven't had a new crush since 2007, but I think I have one on you. Will you be my number 4? Love, deanna.
Um...anyway, I started out writing about the movie He's Just Not That Into You, before I got sidetracked, and wanted to say I'm just kinda not that into it. In fact, I kinda hated it. That's all.

HOPE

Valentine's Day is coming up. I dedicate this song to you from Hope. Feel free to bring me flowers.

**ADDENDUM**
I was asked for my love song mix so I listed it in the comments. If you have any others go ahead and write them in and help out your local neighborhood playa work a mixed love CD.